It was a beautiful day... the sun was out... the breeze was nice... and I was enjoying reading Pride and Prejudice and Zombies in the backyard.
(Best. Book. Ever. Bytheway.)
Then...
My Twitter from 6 hours ago:The guys two houses down just brought a drum set into their backyard... no good can come from this.
Yeah... well, they calmly started playing a little bit and I really didn't mind because I was all into Elizabeth Bennet slaying the minions of Satan with her favorite musket.
Later, though, I realized that there was some noise... but I assumed that it was a car parked at the light in front of my house or something...
But the music didn't go away...
My Twitter from 27 minutes ago:
ARE YOU KIDDING ME? God damn guys with the drums have been playing "music" for 1.5 hrs! OUTSIDE. It's 10:30! & turn off your black light!I AM GOING TO KILL THEM... KILL THEM!
After turning off the TV I couldn't help but acknowledge that there is a JAM BAND in the backyard two houses over...
Drums.
Guitar.
Keyboard set to imitate a PIPE ORGAN.
And bright (black) lights...
And cheering.
And it DOESN'T STOP... ever.
Hippie Invasion from rhymes with milk on Vimeo.
(I know that you can't see anything (like the black lights), but even on my crappy camera, you can HEAR it... remember, there is a whole HOUSE between us...)
So I did what any rational individual would do.
First, I sent my dog out to bark at them.
(Actually, she's been out there off and on all night barking at them... but at this point I stopped telling her to shut up and instead told her to bark away and mess up that jam band-y beat...)
Then, I called Mike.
Me: MIKE!! Those-god-damn-mother-fucking-hippie-bastards-are-playing-jam-band-music- with-black-lights-and-I-am-officially-going-to-kill-them-and-once-they-are-finished-I-am-going-to-go-steal-their-drum-set-or-at-least-put-dog-poop-in-it-and- they-totally-interrupted-my-Grey's Anatomy-which-was-really-good-and-I-KNEW-that-Derek- would-have-to-save-Izzie-and-anyway-I-am-going-to-shoot-me-some-hippies!
Mike: Well... as long as you don't involve the cops...
Next, I did the most logical thing I could think of:
I put my IPOD into it's stereo next to the window and blasted songs from the Wicked soundtrack...
(Take that you damn hippies!! Jam to that, suckas!!)
(Don't make me go all John Cusack on your ass!)
(I actually thought that it had worked... but then I realized that I had turned the Wicked soundtrack up so high that it took a few seconds for my ears to hear those damn drums and keyboard...)
Finally, I documented that I was not the only one suffering here:
Interview with a Hannah from rhymes with milk on Vimeo.
All in all... a very productive night.
So... it's 11:30 at night... and they have expanded... there are now yelling females...
HEY RUDE NEIGHBORS! SOME OF US HAVE TO GO TO WORK IN THE MORNING!
(They don't know that I'm not "some of us"...)
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